329 Credit Card Quotes: Debt Jokes & Money Humor

Best Credit Card Quotes

A check or credit card, a Gucci bag strap, anything of value will do. Give as you live.

Ability is the art of getting credit for all the home runs somebody else hits.

Americans mythologize competition and credit it with saving us from socialist bread lines. Actually, capitalism and competition are opposites. Capitalism is premised on the accumulation of capital, but under perfect competition, all profits get competed away.

An education system where student selection is based on credit capacity and not merit capacity and where graduating students are no longer indebted to the nation, but increasingly indebted to the Australian Taxation Office – that’s no way to improve the quality of education.

An improving credit landscape means fewer loans are delinquent – and fewer people are needed to service these loans.

An institution that borrows on a non-prioritized basis would never contemplate borrowing on a prioritized basis. Doing so would undermine its standing in the bond market and suggest that it is not worthy of its strong credit rating. This type of self-imposed downgrade would materially affect its financial prospects.

And usually the studios they don’t want you to have credit for your movies because they want to take credit for the movies because if you get credit for your movies they’ve got to pay you more.

Any investment bought via credit always runs the risk of margin calls and, eventually, liquidation.

As far as I’m concerned, Aaron is the best ball player of my era. He is to baseball of the last fifteen years what Joe DiMaggio was before him. He’s never received the credit he’s due.

As you know, in the latter part of 2008 and early 2009, the Federal Reserve took extraordinary steps to provide liquidity and support credit market functioning, including the establishment of a number of emergency lending facilities and the creation or extension of currency swap agreements with 14 central banks around the world.

As ‘Austrian’ business cycle theory has pointed out, any bank credit inflation sets up conditions for boom-and-bust; there is no need for prices actually to rise.

Because – Bobby Lewis said this once to us in class, the better you get, the less credit you’ll get. Because the better you are, the more it looks like walking and talking and everybody thinks they can walk and talk.

Before the arrival of the Credit Union, people who were from the poor background or a working class background couldn’t borrow from banks.

Being a Chicano in Hollywood, my experience is that you’re not given credit for any sophistication… You’re just kind of some guy that just crossed the border, you know, on the back of a truck and that’s it.

Being on food stamps can be demeaning. Cashiers know the difference between the new plastic SNAP cards and a credit card. Some food stamp recipients say some cashiers have made them feel uncomfortable and embarrassed.

Bernie Madoff is probably more nuanced then I’m giving him credit for, but I just couldn’t get under his skin.

Bond investors want growth much like equity investors, and to the extent that too much austerity leads to recession or stagnation then credit spreads widen out – even if a country can print its own currency and write its own cheques.

Bubbles are best identified by credit excesses, not valuation excesses. And there’s no bigger credit excess than in China.

By the time most people file for bankruptcy, their credit is already trashed, they have a high debt-to-income ratio – a key indicator lenders look at – and they’ve likely defaulted on more than a few accounts.

Cash from a reverse mortgage can be paid out in several ways, including a lump sum, a monthly payment, a line of credit, or a combination of those. If you do not need money right away, it is usually a bad idea to take all the money upfront, since it starts accumulating interest charges immediately.

Citigroup, Bank of America, and JP Morgan Chase should not be permitted to charge consumers 25- to 30-percent interest on their credit cards, especially while these banks received over $4 trillion in loans from the Federal Reserve.

Companies that make keys, credit card companies, any company in the service business – anything to do with a consumer is probably a software company.

Consumers going through foreclosure typically will see their credit scores drop, raising longer-term questions about their ability to rebound financially and perhaps pursue a more sustainable home purchase at some later point.

Credit buying is much like being drunk. The buzz happens immediately and gives you a lift… The hangover comes the day after.

Credit card agreements run as long as 30 pages, and it’s 30 pages of largely incomprehensible text.

Credit card companies pay college students generously to stand outside dining halls, dorms, and academic buildings and encourage their fellow students to apply for credit cards.

Credit card interest payments are the dumbest money of all.

Credit cards are like snakes: Handle ’em long enough, and one will bite you.

Credit default swap is basically just an agreement that I have with you, where I sell you insurance on some bond you own. If the bond goes belly up, I promise to pay you. And as long as the bond doesn’t go belly up, you pay me for selling you insurance.

Credit is a system whereby a person who can not pay gets another person who can not pay to guarantee that he can pay.

Credit is an ‘I love debt’ score.

Credit markets were originally created to serve human needs; to provide businesses and individuals with capital to start or expand businesses or fulfill other financial needs.

Debt, we’ve learned, is the match that lights the fire of every crisis. Every crisis has its own set of villains – pick your favorite: bankers, regulators, central bankers, politicians, overzealous consumers, credit rating agencies – but all require one similar ingredient to create a true crisis: too much leverage.

Do I have more depth than I’m given credit for? No!

Every central banker in the world pays attention to credit growth, but not in the U.S.

Every year the Federal Government wastes billions of dollars as a result of overpayments of government agencies, misuse of government credit cards, abuse of the Federal entitlement programs, and the mismanagement of the Federal bureaucracy.

Everyone can get a little sloppy with cash and it’s smart to notice. But what’s squeezing you is the big stuff you ladle onto your credit cards.

Everything we do in the digital realm – from surfing the Web to sending an e-mail to conducting a credit card transaction to, yes, making a phone call – creates a data trail. And if that trail exists, chances are someone is using it – or will be soon enough.

Footballers are an easy target. They are offered big lines of credit. Every sport is vulnerable; it’s such a big gambling industry, and there are problems with syndicates in other countries.

Former Senator Al D’Amato in 1991 offered an amendment to cap credit card interest rates at 14 percent.

Friendship, like credit, is highest when it is not used.

From my first dunk at 14 years old to my second NCAA Championship at the University of Tennessee, my intense training with my dad was always to credit.

Generally, an indie film in the U.K. is put together much like in the states. We got a tax credit. You sell the domestic rights, which can be quite low, but it’s enough to push you over the line. And you get a tax credit on top of that, and then you cobble it together with private equity or gap financing and things like that.

George Bush taking credit for the wall coming down is like the rooster taking credit for the sun rising.

Give your kid some credit for being smart – just because they read about something doesn’t mean they will do it.

Giving credit where credit is due is a very rewarding habit to form. Its rewards are inestimable.

He that hath lost his credit is dead to the world.

Hip-hop has done so much for racial relations, and I don’t think it’s given the proper credit. It has changed America immensely. I’m going to make a very bold statement: Hip-hop has done more than any leader, politician, or anyone to improve race relations.

Hip-hop lasted and survived all these years that you have to give it credit. Even though it’s not up to people’s expectations anymore, its still here, and that’s says a lot.

History must give the Poles the principal credit for bringing the Soviet bloc to its knees.

Humility is preserved when I give credit where credit is due – to God.

Here is my general approach to the energy companies. You have already charged the utilities a 50 percent credit penalty for the power they were buying from you. You’re charging us a penalty. You’re not going to get two bites of the apple here.

I don’t believe I’ll ever get credit for anything I do in foreign affairs, no matter how successful it is, because I didn’t go to Harvard.

I don’t deserve any credit for turning the other cheek as my tongue is always in it.

I don’t ever take credit for discovering anybody, except for McLovin on ‘Superbad’.

Funny Credit Card Quotes

I don’t give the devil credit for creating nothing.

I don’t have a wallet. I carry my driver’s license and a couple of credit cards in my phone. That, and a money clip.

I don’t know what a credit bubble means. I don’t even know what a bubble means. These words have become popular. I don’t think they have any meaning.

I don’t think London has been given enough credit in a lot of the movies that we make here.

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with feminist uplift. That’s how we got credit cards in our own name.

I don’t use a debit card. The safest thing is a credit card because you’re using the bank’s money. If someone accesses your information, they are stealing the bank’s money, not yours.

I feel strongly that degrees are really valuable to people, and having MOOCs allow for credit down the line will increase the number of students with the confidence and wherewithal to complete degrees.

I feel whatever an actor does on screen is something the actor ‘does,’ and what the director can do is to tell, talk or instruct. So, all the credit for an actor’s performance goes to the actor alone.

I fully credit my family for keeping me grounded and for putting me back in line whenever necessary.

I get a lot of credit for comb-overs. But it’s not really a comb-over. It’s sort of a little bit forward and back. I’ve combed it the same way for years. Same thing, every time.

I give Cronkite a whole lot of credit.

I give so much credit to the ‘Up’ team who created appointment viewing on the weekends for us and some of the smartest conversations on television.

I go to the Caribbean for a month every January with hand baggage only. All you need is a passport and a credit card.

I got my first break in ‘Bhootnath,’ solely on my credit, and went on to sing for around 20 films for all the leading music composers.

I guess what I learned about myself is I’m a bit of a socialist; I want everyone on the set to get equal treatment and credit.

I had begun to worry about the housing market back in 2003, when lenders first resurrected interest-only mortgages, loosening their credit standards to generate a greater volume of loans. Throughout 2004, I had watched as these mortgages were offered to more and more subprime borrowers – those with the weakest credit.

I had written movie scores, television series, played with other people. Carl had done the same with Asia, with other bands, everything. We weren’t about to entrust Greg automatically with a production credit.

I have actually been very fortunate to be able to make films on my own credit card without having huge funders behind me dictating how the story should be told.

I have breakups that I can credit to every song. In my twenties, I picked people who would create that dysfunction and drama, so I could draw upon it.

I have to give a lot of credit to Sandy Weill, because he gets it. He gets the power of the women’s contribution to the economy.

I just think a lot of people don’t give credit to EDM producers or DJs. People think they’re just button pushers and just get on stage and don’t really perform.

I know a baseball star who wouldn’t report the theft of his wife’s credit cards because the thief spends less than she does.

I know that my works are a credit to this nation and I dare say they will endure longer than the McCarran Act.

I like to take credit for the work that I have done.

I mean that what makes me a professional, but the market itself has been fabulous during this whole period and I’ve got to give the market credit before I give myself credit.

I mean, what Fiat had it was not very big, it was something like forty or fifty million dollars, but it’s enough to get revolving credit, to get starting away again, the buying of new machinery.

I never use debit cards. I only use credit cards. This way, if someone does get my account number… and charges $1 million, by federal law, my liability is zero.

I never want to make a child worried or afraid, and I don’t think I do. My pictures are born from the belief that children are far more capable and aware of social complexities than we give them credit for.

I sincerely hope that I shall always be a credit to my race, and to the motion picture industry.

I started ballet in my early 20s. I studied for about ten years. Ballet is probably the one of the hardest things I’ve done, almost like MMA. People don’t give it a lot of credit and think it’s easy, but it’s very difficult. For an athlete, you use muscles you really don’t use, and ballet is something I really respect.

I started thinking about the endings of novels not because I think endings are so important, but because I think they’re actually not as important as they’re sometimes given credit for.

I still credit Adrian Lester with being one of my biggest influences.

I think being an athlete prepares you for more things than people give us credit for.

I think every credit you get and every film you have your name attached to makes things a little bit easier. It definitely opens doors up, but it’s still a grind.

I think kids are excited by language, and they’re not always given credit for that.

I think, to give our bookshelf a little credit, our area of the library and the bookstore has attracted stronger writers as it’s started to thrive.

I use a credit card for everything – and I choose one of the ones which gives you money back.

I very rarely use a credit card, but I do if I know I have big bills coming and I need to stagger payment.

I was born in 1947, and my generation, like its predecessors, was taught that since our achievements received little notice or credit from white America, we were not to discuss our faults, lapses, or uncertainties in public.

I wish actors got more credit for humour.

If credit unions can grow and prosper with a 15 percent cap, so can banks.

If you decide you need a secured card, use it to charge small items every month, then pay the balance off in full. If your credit score improves, and the bank doesn’t offer to upgrade your card within 12 to 18 months, give them a call. If they refuse, try another lender.

If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who do good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that.

If you need a tax credit to compete, you are probably not that competitive.

If you pay your credit card off every month, get a rewards card. One that gives you airline miles or that will give you 1 percent cash back at least on every purchase.

If your bank took bailout money, take your money out of that bank and put it in a credit union. Credit unions are owned by the people who have their money in the credit union.

In a secular age, an authentic miracle must purport to be a hoax, in order to gain credit in the world.

In an extreme credit crunch, leveraged purchases of gold cause forced sales, because any price correction triggers margin calls. As a result, gold can be very volatile – upward and downward – at the peak of a crisis.

In baseball, you can do something poorly and still get credit. A pitcher could throw a bad ball, the batter hit a screaming line drive, and an outfielder make a fantastic diving catch. Yet, when you look at historical databases, 80% of the time when a ball is struck with that trajectory and velocity, it is a hit.

In essence, the optimistic style involves taking credit for successes but little blame for failures.

In October 2008, when the credit crunch hit, small businesses were really crushed by the lack of capital.

It has always been more expensive for the poor to borrow money. We see this in everything from mortgage rates to credit cards.

It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit.

It is often laziness and timidity that keep us within our duty while virtue gets all the credit.

It is only the poor who pay cash, and that not from virtue, but because they are refused credit.

It seems like they conflate Bruce and the Hulk. It’s usually, ‘Hulk!’ as I’m walking across the street. But sometimes it’s ‘Banner!’ If you go on my Twitter feed, you’ll see it’s mostly Hulk. I think it was pretty spectacular what we were able to accomplish with CGI with ‘The Hulk,’ and I can’t take full credit for that.

It turned out in the long run that Lincoln’s credit and the popular confidence that supported it were as valuable both to his creditors and himself as if the sums which stood over his signature had been gold coin in a solvent bank.

Credit Card Quotes About Debt

It was my first big relationship and it was just very abusive. I wouldn’t give him the credit of naming him, if he ever reads this. But he was older, in the music business – or so he said.

It’s aggravating that Hollywood has never gotten credit for the role it played in promoting modern design.

It’s an open secret that if a debtor is willing to wait long enough, he can probably get away with paying almost nothing, as long as he doesn’t mind hurting his credit score.

It’s one thing if you write a song and somebody else sings it because you give the OK. But if your voice is on something and you don’t get the credit, it’s kind of hard.

It’s really frustrating when you’re an identity-theft victim, and you go to the police and you say, ‘This guy in Florida, he stole my name and got a credit card – this is his address,’ and they say, ‘We don’t have jurisdiction in Florida. You need to go to the FBI.’

I’d never take any credit for David’s music – that’s all his.

I’m a neurotic Jew who doesn’t want loans. I can’t even carry a balance on my credit card without having a nervous breakdown.

I’m not alone, I’m free. I no longer have to be a credit, I don’t have to be a symbol to anybody; I don’t have to be a first to anybody.

I’m really proud of Twilight. I think it’s a good movie. It was hard to do, and I think it turned out pretty good. But I don’t take much credit for it. So when you show up at these places, and there’s literally like a thousand girls and they’re all screaming your name, you’re like, why? You don’t feel like you deserve it.

I’m very interested in the more grass-roots consequences of the economic meltdown: issues related to mortgage foreclosures, debt collection, and the practices of credit card companies and others who hold a lot of consumer debt.

I’ve always maintained that the problem in India is that we only give credit to big contributions.

I’ve got this thing where I think great shows have great credit sequences. I don’t know why that is, exactly.

I’ve learned never to count Vin Diesel out. Just don’t do that. And I guess it’s because he is a very smart guy. Smarter than people give him credit for.

I’ve never been a Clinton fan. He’s had some accomplishments, and he’s very skilled at politics, but, you know, he’s had some successes and a very good economy. And the question is how much or how little of that does he deserve credit for.

I’ve never been a fan of presidents who place blame on their predecessors or who accept credit for events that couldn’t have been engineered so soon in their tenure.

I’ve never gotten cash out of a machine. I use my credit cards, so I don’t need to do that.

I’ve never really had a problem with the imagination level of an audience. They’re always smarter and savvier than any studio exec will give them credit for.

Jesus Christ, Luke 6:32-33.

Keep up appearances; there lies the test. The world will give thee credit for the rest.

Lenders look at potential borrowers from many angles before extending credit: How much of its income will a household need to put into debt repayment? How large is the down payment? Does the borrower have a job with a stable income? What is the borrower’s credit score?

Lenders, including major credit companies as well as payday lenders, have taken over the traditional role of the street-corner loan shark, charging the poor insanely high rates of interest.

Let me remind you that credit is the lifeblood of business, the lifeblood of prices and jobs.

Let those only return to their homes who are called by the imperative duties which they owe to their families, and those who by their glorious wounds have deserved the credit of their country.

Main Street investors, who cannot trade credit default swaps, should not be tempted to trade an instrument with the same risk profile simply because it has been given a different name.

Men are often capable of greater things than they perform – They are sent into the world with bills of credit, and seldom draw to their full extent.

Men are sent into the world with bills of credit, and seldom draw to their full extent.

Michigan is also the only industrial state that has a AAA credit rating.

Modern money is almost altogether credit money.

Most credit cards provide some sort of protection against a defective purchase, and with gold or platinum cards, you’ll often get double the manufacturer’s warranty. You’re also not immediately out your own money if something goes wrong.

Most sketch aficionados have an enormous amount of respect for ‘Mr. Show.’ I didn’t have HBO back then, so I was always trying to find episodes. Bob Odenkirk and David Cross became celebrities, and Jay Johnston – who’s lesser known, but brilliant – deserves a lot of credit, too.

My bookshelves have no order. I prune them regularly and sell the books to Myopic Books, a Chicago bookstore. They give me store credit, and then I spend all the store credit, and, presumably, return to sell them back more of the books I bought from them.

My brother Van got the computer first and showed me what it was like to edit video. I definitely credit Van with turning me onto filmmaking.

My director is usually aware of what works for me and what doesn’t. For ‘Srimanthudu,’ I have to give full credit to director Koratala Sivagaru for handling my character the way he did.

Never call an accountant a credit to his profession; a good accountant is a debit to his profession.

Nine of 10 whites in Chicago borrow from top-drawer banks and mortgage companies, which the industry calls prime lenders. They lend to people with A credit ratings, making loans at competitive rates.

No one lives on credit in France because banks don’t allow overdrafts and zero percent credit cards do not exist.

No person will make a great business who wants to do it all himself or get all the credit.

Nobody would take checks from Indians, nobody would give them any credit, and nobody would let them drink in the bars. There was a rudeness, a brusqueness, with which the Indians were treated constantly. At a very young age, that had entered my consciousness.

Non-bank financial institutions provide credit that is essential to U.S. businesses and consumers.

Of course, Dwight D. Eisenhower gets credit for doing more for golf than any other White House resident, a mid- to high-handicapper though he was.

Oftentimes, small business owners are unable to obtain reasonably priced financing and instead turn to higher priced forms of capital, such as credit cards.

On any measure, Spain’s bank rescue has been a disaster. A hundred million euros have been added to the national debt, ten-year bonds are at a record high and the country’s credit rating has been downgraded three notches.

One must credit an hypothesis with all that has had to be discovered in order to demolish it.

Our government is deeply disordered; its credit is impaired; its debt increasing; its expenditures extravagant and wasteful; its disbursements without efficient accountability; and its taxes (for duties are but taxes) enormous, unequal, and oppressive to the great producing classes of the country.

Our society does not give nearly enough credit to business leaders who create jobs, behave ethically and provide products and services that enhance our lives.

People give us credit only for what we ourselves believe.

People have more dimensions to them than we give them credit for. The person you meet on the street that you think is someone, and it’s someone else. I’m mistaken for someone else all the time.

People who don’t vote have no line of credit with people who are elected and thus pose no threat to those who act against our interests.

People who start habitually exercising tend on average to eat better. They also tend to use their credit cards less and procrastinate less.

Perhaps I have a wider range than I’d given myself credit for.

Probably we never fully credit the interdependence of wild creatures, and their cognizance of the affairs of their own kind.

Procrastination is like a credit card: it’s a lot of fun until you get the bill.

Remember that credit is money.

Famous Credit Card Quotes

Restore, without delay, the equilibrium between revenue and expenditures, which has done so much to destroy our credit and derange the whole fabric of government. If that should not be done, the government and country will be involved, ere long, in overwhelming difficulties.

Rick Wakeman and Jon Anderson have rejoined and gone off again and rejoined, but I’ve been there the whole time, and even though Alan White is the ‘new’ drummer, he has been there since 1972, so he also deserves the credit for being around for 20 years.

Simply calling your credit card issuer and asking them to lower your interest rate may yield immediate savings.

Snooki is really beautiful and looks quite like Elizabeth Taylor in ‘Cleopatra.’ She has the same bone structure. I’m kind of obsessed with ‘Jersey Shore.’ People don’t give them enough credit for how entertaining they are.

So I think it was to Bryan’s credit that he was able to let go of some of those things because you create these scenes and you think you become creative, even I, acting things, you become very creatively taken by it.

Soldiers generally win battles; generals get credit for them.

Some fellows get credit for being conservative when they are only stupid.

Some guys lay their fannies out there every night – they play the game at such a high level, and they give so much that, frankly, they don’t get credit for it. And I think it’s tragic sometimes.

Starting in late 2007, faced with acute financial market distress, the Federal Reserve created programs to keep credit flowing to households and businesses. The loans extended under those programs helped stabilize the financial system.

Strapped by tight credit and plummeting sales, businesses have overhauled the way they manage supply chains, inventory, production practices and staffing.

Stripe is building payment infrastructure for the Web, so we make it easy to accept credit cards online. Before Stripe, the way you’d do this is using the legacy banking structure. It was slow, it was complex, it was expensive. It had this very chilling effect on e-commerce.

Subprime mortgages, typically defined as those issued to borrowers with low credit scores, make up roughly the riskiest one-third of all mortgages.

Sustaining true friendship is a lot more challenging than we give it credit for.

Talking about Korea, it has pretty high capital ratios at banks and maintains a good credit rating.

Tax expenditures for middle- and working-class Americans – like the earned income tax credit – aren’t thought of as loopholes; they’re just thought of as benefits.

The American public’s a lot more sophisticated than we all give them credit for. And on complicated issues, I’m going to give them straight answers. And if it takes more than three minutes, I’m going to do it.

The broken consumer credit market had to be repaired by making sure that consumers had the right information and could use it effectively. That meant consolidating the bloated patchwork of ineffective agencies and regulations so that a single agency could act as a voice for consumers.

The business of a bank is to lend money; which amounts, nowadays, to lending credit.

The childcare tax credit makes some sense.

The Constitution grants only Congress – not the president – the power ‘to borrow money on the credit of the United States.’

The credit of advancing science has always been due to individuals and never to the age.

The credit quality of junk bonds varies widely.

The credit reporting system suffers from inaccuracy and often from outright injustice.

The Democrats co-opted the credit for the Civil Rights Act of 1964. But if you go back and look at the history, a larger percentage of Republicans voted for that than did Democrats. But a Democrat president signed it, so they co-opted credit for having passed the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and the Voting Rights Act of 1965.

The developing world is full of entrepreneurs and visionaries, who with access to education, equity and credit would play a key role in developing the economic situations in their countries.

The fact that the theatregoing public likes my music is no credit to me. There are many other composers who write better music that the public doesn’t like.

The failure of credit markets is one of the major reasons for underdevelopment.

The Fed contributed to the financial crisis, keeping interest rates too low for too long. I give them credit for responding and stabilizing the economy and the financial sector during the crisis. But then they tried to do too much with quantitative easing that went on forever, just dramatically exploding their balance sheets.

The Federal Reserve has the responsibility to protect the credit rights of consumers.

The guy who finally pulled the trigger on Osama bin Laden is not patting himself on the back. He’s giving as much credit to his teammates who got him to that position.

The interesting thing about the China story, getting back to the macro and micro, and as dire as I think the macro story is – due to bad credit and credit extension that makes Greece and Spain and the U.S. look like child’s play – when you get to the micro of individual companies, they look even worse.

The lack of available credit and loans is having a severe impact on small businesses in particular, but also their suppliers and the bigger companies too.

The level of credit in Mexico has shown to be low. And where credit concentrates the most favors large corporations and not companies.

The Luxembourg financial centre is based on several pillars, we are characterised by the breadth of our product range, we are an active participant in the international credit business.

The more credit you give away, the more will come back to you. The more you help others, the more they will want to help you.

The most famous and one of the most thoroughgoing opponents of bank credit was Thomas Jefferson. Jefferson reacted to the panic of 1819 as a confirmation of his pessimistic views on banks.

The NSA has built an infrastructure that allows it to intercept almost everything. With this capability, the vast majority of human communications are automatically ingested without targeting. If I wanted to see your emails or your wife’s phone, all I have to do is use intercepts. I can get your emails, passwords, phone records, credit cards.

The Patriot Act unleashed the FBI to search your email, travel and credit records without even a suspicion of wrongdoing.

The rich are different from you and me because they have more credit.

The trouble with being a ghostwriter or artist is that you must remain rather anonymously without credit. If one wants the credit, one has to cease being a ghost and become a leader or innovator.

The way that customers pay businesses is constantly evolving. Instead of paying with paper, like cash and checks, businesses are expected to accept a variety of payment methods ranging from credit cards to digital payments.

The way to get things done is not to mind who gets the credit for doing them.

The wealth of the country, its capital, its credit, must be saved from the predatory poor as well as the predatory rich, but above all from the predatory politician.

The world is divided into people who do things and people who get the credit.

The writer of ‘The Red Road,’ Aaron Guzikowski, deserves the credit. The fact that the dialogue is so understated is what makes this show so appealing, especially as an actor.

The ‘boom-bust’ cycle is generated by monetary intervention in the market, specifically bank credit expansion to business.

There are clearly some policies that need to change, and the reputation of the credit card industry is not high. Reforms need to take place.

There are lots of families who – who make irresponsible purchases. There are also a lot of families who have debt on credit cards because they use those credit cards to pay for medical bills.

There are only so many times I can say, ‘I owe it to my offensive linemen,’ or, ‘The credit should go to my teammates,’ before it becomes run down.

There can be a lot done if you are not so particular about who gets credit for it.

There have always been female artists and singers putting bands together all the time. But we were not always getting credit for that because we didn’t know any better.

There is an attitude that we should be able to have everything. No, you shouldn’t be able to have anything. I’d like a helicopter, but I can’t afford a helicopter, so I don’t buy one. People are buying stuff they can’t afford on credit. I bought my Ford hybrid with cash.

There is more credit and satisfaction in being a first-rate truck driver than a tenth-rate executive.

There is no limit to what a man can do so long as he does not care a straw who gets the credit for it.

There is nothing less to our credit than our neglect of the foreigner and his children, unless it be the arrogance most of us betray when we set out to ‘Americanize’ him.

Short Credit Card Quotes for Instagram

There will be no name-calling when I disagree with anyone, no disparaging remarks toward anyone, no taking sole credit for collective achievements or blaming others when things go wrong.

There’s no credit in not doing what you don’t want to do. There’s no virtue in not falling, when you’re not tempted.

There’s probably more in the American tradition than people give the place credit for.

They say the people most affected by the credit crunch are pensioners – well, let go of the handbag then, Nanna.

They’re pretty good actually, Hall & Oates. I gotta give them credit. They got a lot of toe-tappers.

They’re pushing credit cards. They don’t take Visa, but they do take American Express, or they don’t take this one, but they take that one, or you’d better bring this one, or if you forget who you are, look on your credit card; it will be there.

They’re sheep. They like Bush enough to credit him with saving the nation after 9/11. Three thousand people get killed, and everybody thinks they’re next on the list. The president comes along, and he’s got his six-guns strapped on, and people think he’s going to save them.

Thinkers too often disparage men of action in ways that do them no credit.

This flattery has been rather slow in coming. I think all of sudden late in life now I’m getting some credit for what I’ve done. Which is gratifying, but it’s kind of a little late.

To bring down your credit card balances, write down the benefits of reducing your debt. No more gnawing feeling that you’re throwing money away, perhaps. More money flowing to other financial objectives. Then consult the list when you have doubts.

To his lasting credit, President Reagan never wavered. He recognized the strategic importance of staying the course, both in terms of denying Moscow the military hegemony it sought in Western Europe and of restoring the will, cohesiveness, and security of the NATO alliance, so badly frayed during the turbulent 1970s.

To the extent that bank panics interfere with normal flows of credit, they may affect the performance of the real economy.

Today, credit rating agencies rate companies, countries and bonds.

Too many writers of fiction don’t give the reader enough credit.

Trying to take the credit for Jamie Carragher and Steven Gerrard, who had been at the club since they were eight. Can you believe it? I can’t.

Two European nations emerged with credit from the Iraq disaster: France and Germany. Both had the courage to withstand the Bush administration and oppose the U.S.-led invasion.

We always expect tremendous criticism. It is my role to be the lightning rod … to attract the attacks against the organization for our work, and that is a difficult role. On the other hand, I get undue credit.

We always take credit for the good and attribute the bad to fortune.

We are a multicultural country – always have been, and to our credit, always will be. It is something that we should be very proud of and embrace.

We can recognize and give credit where credit is due, to the debt of taste we owe Europe, but we have taste, too.

We can’t take any credit for our talents. It’s how we use them that counts.

We have new rules that give shareholders the ability to vote on executive compensation. We have new rules for asset-backed securities. We have new rules around credit rating agencies.

We haven’t really gotten the credit for what we have done.

We know more about our credit cards than we know about our bodies.

We were going to have to experiment, and we needed to develop our younger players. And a lot of the changes were because of injuries. But that’s where I give a lot of credit to the group in terms of being able to maintain things.

We’re not running the ball again until we get ahead. Shula was calling the plays, but I told them, ‘I don’t care what he calls. We’re throwing every pass from now until we get the lead.’ To Shula’s credit, he always gave me that option.

What people don’t realize is that China papered over its last two credit bubbles, those in 1999 and 2004. The banks were never bailed out – they just exchanged their bad loans for questionable bonds from quasi-state organizations.

What the F.D.I.C. does is to put the full faith and credit of the United States government behind every savings account in the nation, up to a limit that has changed over the years and stands now at $100,000.

What the study I chaired actually said was we needed tougher regulation of cash and capital in banks, as credit was too easy. Events proved that right.

What Wall Street and credit card companies are doing is really not much different from what gangsters and loan sharks do who make predatory loans. While the bankers wear three-piece suits and don’t break the knee caps of those who can’t pay back, they still are destroying people’s lives.

When I moved to Los Angeles, I was straight out of grad school, and I didn’t have a single credit to my name. I knew one person in town – another actor whose name is John Billingsley. I just had to audition and audition and audition. I was plugging away for 15 years. So I earned my stripes!

When we make purchases on credit, they give us only an illusion of prosperity.

When you are younger you get blamed for crimes you never committed and when you’re older you begin to get credit for virtues you never possessed. It evens itself out.

When you shop online, wouldn’t you like to sample the bouquet of wines, the aroma of cigars, or the subtle fragrance of flowers before surrendering your credit card number? Surely more companies will want to aromatize their Web presence when they realize there’s a device that can produce genuinely pleasing, authentic fragrances.

When you take a look at the problems our country is facing, debt is No. 1. The math is downright scary and the credit markets aren’t going to keep on giving us cheap rates.

When you’re 23, 24 years old and somebody’s given you a credit card and jets and limos and you don’t have to pay the bill when it comes in – that’s a pretty nice deal.

Whenever I’ve been well-known or hitting the press, I’ve always had to get my credit card out to prove I’m Damien Hirst.

Whether you’re earning $7 an hour or $700,000 a year, it’s very important to protect your credit rating.

While conventional wisdom has traditionally sided against borrowing from retirement savings, sentiment has shifted toward borrowing from one’s own assets with the realization that other forms of credit come at a much higher cost and often are not even available to borrowers with limited means and urgent needs.

Who deserves more credit than the wife of a coal miner? Mother was one.

With the aid of this credit policy, however, Germany created an armament second to none, and this armament in turn made possible the results of our policy.

Women don’t get the credit they deserve.

Yes, Americans can still get credit for cars and trucks and refrigerators, and those businesses are doing well. But just try to get a home loan now.

You can examine the whole 19th century from the point of view of who would have maxed out their credit cards. Emma Bovary would have maxed hers out. No question. Mr. Scrooge would not have. He would have snipped his up.

You can’t fuel real economic growth with indiscriminate credit. You can only fuel it with well-allocated, long-term investment.

You don’t go to the people that are just like you. You go to the people that you have to earn their credit.

You don’t realize how much you use your credit card not even to buy things. It’s a card you get so you can navigate society.

You stick a credit card in a machine, and you pay $3 or whatever it is to get cash – your own money.

You will not accept credit that is due to another, or harbor jealousy of an explorer who is more fortunate.

Credit Card Quotes About Money

My credit card thinks I’m rich. My bank account disagrees. — Unknown

Swiping plastic hurts less than paying cash. That’s exactly the trap. — Unknown

I buy now and let future me deal with it. We’re not on speaking terms. — Unknown

My wallet has more cards than a poker dealer and less money than a kid’s lemonade stand. — Unknown

The statement arrives on the first. My regrets arrive on the second. — Unknown

Credit cards: because waiting to afford things is for other people. — Unknown

I don’t always pay my balance in full, but when I do, company’s coming over. — Unknown

My credit limit is just a suggestion box for my bad decisions. — Unknown

There’s no money in my account, but there’s hope in my wallet. — Unknown

I put the fun in funds I don’t have. — Unknown

Swipe now, think later. The motto of my twenties and, apparently, my thirties. — Unknown

My credit card bill is the only horror story I read every month. — Unknown

I’m not shopping. I’m investing in my future happiness, one swipe at a time. — Unknown

Cash is king, but plastic is the queen who actually runs the kingdom. — Unknown

My card got declined at the coffee shop. I told the barista it was a budgeting feature. — Unknown

Minimum payments: the subscription service I never signed up for. — Unknown

I budget carefully. Then I see a sale, and all bets are off. — Unknown

They say money can’t buy happiness. My credit card statement begs to differ. — Unknown

I’ve got 99 problems and the minimum due is every single one. — Unknown

Paying in full is my love language. Minimum payment is my cry for help. — Unknown

My credit score went up. I’m basically a financial genius now. — Unknown

I don’t need therapy. I need a higher credit limit. — Unknown

The best things in life are free. The second best things cost 24.99% APR. — Unknown

I swipe right on every purchase and left on every bill. — Unknown

My card works harder than I do. — Unknown

Adulting is realizing the bill always comes due, usually on a Monday. — Unknown

I’m building credit. Very, very slowly. Like, glacier slowly. — Unknown

My rewards points are funding my dreams. My interest charges are funding the bank’s dreams. — Unknown

I used to be afraid of commitment. Then I got a 24-month payment plan. — Unknown

Plastic money, real consequences. The funniest tragedy ever told. — Unknown

I told my card I’d take it out less. It laughed in chip reader. — Unknown

The difference between me and a millionaire is about three swipes and a lot of denial. — Unknown

My budget said no. My heart said yes. My card said approved. — Unknown

I’m not in debt. I’m just pre-spending my future wealth, which is a completely reasonable strategy until you check the balance and realize the future is now. — Unknown

Every swipe is a tiny loan from a future version of me who hates me. — Unknown

Credit card companies love me. My savings account filed a restraining order. — Unknown

I pay my bill on time every month. It’s the only relationship I’ve never ghosted. — Unknown

Swiping feels like magic until the statement performs its disappearing-money trick. — Unknown

My financial plan: hope. My financial tool: plastic. — Unknown

I don’t chase points. Okay, I chase points. — Unknown

The card said approved so fast, I didn’t have time to feel guilty. — Unknown

I’m financially responsible. I responsibly charge everything and pay it off. Eventually. — Unknown

My card has seen things. Expensive, regrettable things. — Unknown

Budgeting tip: if you don’t look at the statement, the debt can’t hurt you. Allegedly. — Unknown

I treat my credit card like a gym membership: I pay for it and never use it wisely. — Unknown

Nothing builds character like explaining a charge to your own conscience. — Unknown

My credit card is my emergency fund, my vacation fund, and my bad-idea fund. — Unknown

I swipe, therefore I am. Broke, but I am. — Unknown

The limit is not a target. I repeat this to myself daily. — Unknown

Paying off a card feels better than buying anything I ever put on it. — Unknown

My card’s favorite word is approved. My wallet’s favorite word is help. — Unknown

I don’t spend money. I borrow it monthly. — Unknown

Interest is just the price of impatience, and I’m very impatient. — Unknown

My credit card statement reads like a diary of my worst decisions and best weekends, and honestly, I’d read the sequel if the interest charges weren’t so steep. — Unknown

I’d save money if it weren’t for all the amazing deals. — Unknown

The card doesn’t make you spend. It just makes spending feel weightless. — Unknown

I’m working toward zero balance. The journey is long and full of sales. — Unknown

My credit score is higher than my willpower. Barely. — Unknown

Swipe culture: where want and need wear the same disguise. — Unknown

One day I’ll be completely debt-free and financially serene. Today is not that day, and unfortunately this sale ends tonight, so future me will just have to understand. — Unknown

Frequently Asked Questions About Credit Card Quotes

Why are credit card jokes so relatable?

Because almost everyone has stood in a checkout line doing mental math they didn’t want to do. Credit cards are this weird mix of freedom and anxiety — buy now, feel it later — and jokes are how we process that tension. Laughing at the shared absurdity (“my card thinks I’m rich”) is more fun than crying at the statement.

Is credit card debt actually funny?

The jokes are funny; the debt isn’t. That’s exactly why these quotes work — they let people laugh at a stressful topic without pretending the stress isn’t real. If the jokes hit a little too close to home, that’s your sign to look at the actual numbers, make a plan, and then come back for the jokes. Both can be true.

Can I use these quotes as captions or in a comedy set?

Yes. Every quote here is an original written for this page, so you’re free to post them, share them, or work them into material. A credit to AllQuotesAbout.com is appreciated but not required. (Comedians: the “my credit card thinks I’m rich” bit writes itself — you’re welcome.)

Why are all the quotes attributed to Unknown?

Because they’re genuinely new, written by our team for this collection. The internet loves pinning money jokes to famous names who never said them; we’d rather be honest. These are originals, labeled exactly as what they are.

What’s the best credit card quote for someone drowning in debt?

Honestly? Skip the jokes for a minute and read this instead: “One day I’ll be completely debt-free — and on that day, I’m framing the zero balance.” Then make the plan: list the balances, attack the highest interest first, and automate the minimums so nothing gets worse. The jokes will be here when you’re ready to laugh again.

Do credit cards help or hurt your finances?

Both, depending on the human holding them. Used right — paid in full monthly — they’re free rewards and purchase protection. Used wrong, they’re the most expensive loan you’ll ever take. The card isn’t the problem or the solution; the habit is. Know which one you have, and act accordingly.